M-PATH (Massachusetts Psychosis Access and Triage Hub, a program of the Brookline Center for Community Mental Health) is a free statewide referral and consultation service available to anyone concerned about early psychosis for themselves, their loved one, or their child. We are an experienced team who specializes in working with youth, young adults, and families experiencing early psychosis. We can also help individuals and families quickly connect with specialty mental health services and assist with the referral and care coordination process. Call us at 617-927-9809 or email us at mpath@brooklinecenter.org.

Good for anyone for wants to talk or chat live with someone who can help.

When you contact the Massachusetts Behavioral Health Helpline (BHHL) you’ll reach a trained expert who can help you connect with the right treatment.

The BHHL is available 24 hours a day, 365 days a year in more than 200 languages by phone call and text at 833-773-2445 (BHHL), and online chat at masshelpline.com

• This is a free, confidential resource available to all Massachusetts residents.

Struggling To Communicate With Your Teen or Young Adult Child?

WHO: Parents and caregivers of individuals aged 12-35 years with mental or behavioral health concerns

WHAT: Receive 4-5 coaching sessions by a trained therapist on motivational interviewing for loved ones (MILO), a communication technique

WHEN: In person appointments at Boston Medical Center or by telehealth

LEARNABOUTMILO@BMC.ORG (401)206-0586

Every child is different and so is every provider. Finding the right help for your child is going to be a journey, and there might not be an easy or fast answer. That’s why we’ve created this guide to help empower you with the information you need to make that journey just a little easier.

Most mental health services like therapy or medication management are paid for with insurance. Contact your insurance company to learn about what behavioral health treatment benefits are available to you and your child. Each insurance company has a list on its website, and there is also a number on the back of your insurance card where you can get help finding out about your child’s benefits.

Begin to get help by speaking with someone you trust or whom you already have a good relationship with. Some families prefer to see what help might be available at their child’s school, at the pediatrician’s office, or through a local community organization. Many times parents ask other parents about their experiences with local providers. It’s a good idea to make a list of a few options for support, because some might have a long wait or might not be a good fit. 

Some kids’ mental health organizations work with specific communities and cultures, like Black or Latino families, or they can help with certain problems, like substance use or family violence. Look for ones that fit your family’s needs.

What do you mean it’s going to be a journey? 

You are trying to get help for your child.  Finding and accessing mental health care and treatment is not always as easy as any of us would like it to be. We know that this is especially the case for communities of color, the LGBTQ+ community, and families with financial challenges, who are often unfairly labeled, dismissed, or blamed. Many people are working to establish a true system of behavioral health care, one with no-wrong-door to enter and real-time access, but it’s important to acknowledge that these challenges exist.

Mental health organizations are often under-resourced, without enough staff to address needs when they come up, which may lead to delays in accessing treatment. This is especially frustrating to parents when they are trying to find help for their child. What this means is that the system may not give you its best unless you demand its best. You may need to call more than once to get through to the right person. You may need to wait longer than you’d like for an appointment. You may need to say, ‘Slow down, that doesn’t make sense to me.’ You may need to say, ‘This isn’t working for my child, what other options are there?’

What you need to know is that you have a right to ask questions, ask for options, and push for care that works well for your family. These organizations exist to help your child. Your role as a parent is to make your and your child’s needs clear.

What if the issues are only happening at school?

If you’re noticing behavior that is out of the ordinary for your child but is mainly only occurring at school, or if you notice that your child might be having difficulty learning, the best place to start is with your child’s teacher. If you do not feel that you are getting the support you need from your child’s teacher, you can raise the issue within the school to any administrator (someone in the “central office”).  You can also reach out to the guidance staff or any family support staff for the school that can help point you in the right direction (take a look at your school’s directory).  

If you feel your child needs extra help, then you can talk with your school about accommodations that they have for all learners who are struggling academically or with their social and emotional health or regulation.  The school should have some good ideas about how to ensure your child is successful in their learning.  You can help brainstorm with your school about whether a behavior plan, some emotional supports, or some other intervention can help your child.

If you feel your child is being bullied or has some other social situation which is affecting their behavior or their mental health you should contact your school immediately.  You can find more information here.

If you believe that your child may need special education services because your child is experiencing a barrier to their ability to learn, then you should contact the school and request a special education evaluation.  You do not need to meet any threshold to request an evaluation of your child.  The school will respond to you and conduct such an evaluation.  You will then meet with the school and discuss whether your child is eligible for services.  If your child is not eligible for special education services, you can still speak with the school about how to support your individual child and ensure that your child is getting what they need to be a successful and stable student. 

People working in mental health can have different types of degrees, and might use different approaches. Here are some of the most common types:

Licensed Social Workers & Mental Health Counselors

Licensed social workers and mental health counselors are trained to make diagnoses and can provide individual, family, and/or group therapy. They may also help with coordinating care with other people in your child and family’s life like their teacher or pediatrician.

Pro: They have been trained to provide therapy and some will help your family with other issues too, like finding stable housing or food.

Con: They can’t prescribe medications and usually don’t perform testing to diagnose problems.

Psychologists

Psychologists have advanced degrees and are trained to make diagnoses, and to provide individual, family and/or group therapy or counseling.

Pro: Psychologists have years of training and can provide individual, family and/or group therapy. Many psychologists can perform psychological testing to help clarify a diagnosis or problem like a learning disability. 

Con: Psychologists cannot prescribe medication in most states, including Massachusetts.

Family Partners

Family partners have their own lived experience parenting a child with a mental health challenge. They have ‘been there’ and are great mentors to guide parents who might be just starting on their journey.

Pro: Family partners have usually been through something similar, and therefore might be able to understand what you are going through more directly.

Con: In some cases, family partners might have less ‘formal’ training than other professionals, but many do have training and also draw on their own, powerful lived experiences. Family partners cannot prescribe medication.

Psychiatrists

Psychiatrists are medical doctors with special training in the diagnosis of mental and emotional illnesses.

Pro: Psychiatrists have medical degrees, so they can prescribe medication, if you both agree that is the right treatment for your child. They can also help you tease out an accurate diagnosis for your child.

Con: It can be hard to get an appointment with a child psychiatrist. There are just fewer of them around than other mental health professionals. If you feel like your child might need medication to help them manage their feelings or behaviors, you might want to start with your pediatrician to see if they can help. Psychiatrists typically don’t offer psychotherapy (counseling) because their time is limited.

Just like other times when your child isn’t feeling well, a professional might recommend a treatment to help them feel better. Here are some common ones.

Therapy

Therapy is about talking about feelings and exploring the emotions beneath behaviors. It can be done many ways, including with your child on their own, in groups with other kids, or with the whole family.

• Pro: Therapy can help many kids, and has very few side effects.

• Con: In some cases, therapy can take longer to help than some medications, and therapy alone may not work for all mental health problems.

Medication

There are medication options for treating mental health issues like depression, anxiety and ADHD. They are best used in combination with therapy.

• Pro: Medication might help to treat some symptoms of mental health issues in kids.

• Con: Every medication comes with risks and side effects, and they might not work for every kid. 

Peer Support

Peers can provide support and share what they have been through. Both parents and kids can get a lot from peer groups.

• Pro: Connecting with others who have had similar experiences can be really helpful because it helps us understand that we are not alone.

• Con: Some peer support programs use group sessions or home visits, which might not work for every parent. It’s important to find a program that works for you and someone who you feel comfortable with.

Intensive Home and Community-Based Services

Intensive home and community-based services can assist your family with many needs, including family therapy and help with housing, education and coordinating your child’s treatment.

• Pro: Many community services can be provided in your home and at times that are convenient for you. Some have a focus on specific cultures, like Black or Latino families, and can help families with challenges beyond their child’s behavior or feelings.

• Con: Some community services require more time and energy from families—but the returns can be big. Ask how they approach working with families to see if it’s a good fit for you.

Alternative & Complementary Medicine

Treatments outside of mainstream Western medicine, like dietary supplements or acupuncture, are commonly used by many people.

• Pro: If these treatments make someone feel good, they can encourage positive thinking, which can help improve mental health challenges.

• Con: Many of these treatments have not been studied well by scientists, so we don’t know if they work, or what the risks might be—especially for kids. It’s a good idea to check with a professional about these treatments.

Tools at Home

Kids and parents can try new behaviors and tools at home, like meditation or exercise. Check out some of our tools here.

• Pro: Trying new approaches can have a big effect on your entire family, not only for your child that you are concerned about. Reducing everyone’s stress and improving communication will have benefits for the whole family.

• Con: These tools require you to learn new skills and to practice them consistently to get good at them - just like anything new that you try! This can mean more work when you are already busy, but they can also reduce fights and stress in the long run.

Professionals use these words all the time and sometimes don’t take the time to explain them to parents. You should always feel like you can ask them to clarify, but if you want a head start, these are some common words you might hear:

Mental Health

Mental health refers to our wellbeing and includes how we feel emotionally, psychologically and in our relationships with other people. Lots of things can influence our mental health: our genes, the chemicals in our brains, and life experiences (like experiencing violence or losing a loved one).

Mental health problems in kids are common—as many as 1 in 6 children have a mental health condition—and can often be treated successfully.

Anxiety

Anxiety refers to when kids react very quickly or strongly to situations that feel scary to them—like new situations or experiences—or when they have a hard time getting their anxious feelings under control. They might also find the world scarier or more dangerous than other kids.

Most kids feel scared or anxious sometimes, but they often learn to cope with fears and worries. Anxiety becomes a problem when it gets in the way of kids doing things, or when it feels out of proportion to the problems they are facing.

Depression

Depression often comes with feeling sad or down, but it is more than just being sad. Depression can make kids irritable and feel like nothing is worthwhile, or that things will never get better. It can get in the way of kids enjoying the things they usually like to do.

Attention Deficit or Hyperactivity

Attention deficit disorder (ADD) or attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) makes it hard for kids to stop their spontaneous responses - so they might move or talk when they ‘shouldn’t’ or might have trouble focusing.

All kids occasionally get fidgety, act without thinking, or forget to do things. Kids with ADHD might have more trouble with these issues than other kids.

Trauma

When kids experience traumatic events, like witnessing violence or being abused, they can have strong emotions and physical reactions that last for a long time after the event. They may feel scared and helpless, have difficulty sleeping and eating, forming relationships, or many other issues.

Grief and Loss

Kids feel grief when they lose a loved one, just like adults. But because kids understand death differently, they also might react differently. Some kids might get quiet and withdrawn, while others might express their feelings by acting out.

Time with professionals can feel rushed or too short, but coming prepared for your visit can help.

1. Try tracking the behaviors

If there are specific behaviors or feelings that you are worried about, try keeping track of them so you can tell the professional what you see more specifically. How often do they happen? What triggers them? Does anything help or make them worse?

2. Write down your questions

It can also help to write down any questions you have been wondering about. Then, when you go for the visit, you won’t have to try to remember them on the spot.

3. Bring info or reports from school or other professionals

If your child has had testing at school or you have reports or summaries from other helping professionals, bring those with you to your first appointment. This might save you from having to tell your story again and can make your time together more productive.

4. Know your “end-game”

It can help to think about what you are hoping things will look like by the end of treatment. Are you wishing for more peaceful family dinners and fewer arguments? Do you hope your child will be more focused and calmer? Are you interested in feeling more relaxed and confident in how to handle your child’s tantrums? Writing down your vision for the future can help everyone know when it might be time for treatment to end.

Here are a few questions that might be helpful to ask when you contact service providers:

• Do you have expertise in treating children my child’s age?

• Do you have experience treating my child’s symptoms?

• Do you take my child’s insurance? How much will your services cost me?

• What are the steps to access your services?

• Is there a wait?

• What is your approach to helping kids with their mental health?

• How are parents and other family members involved in treatment? What are your expectations for parent involvement?

• Will you work with my child’s other health care providers/school?

Some kids’ mental health organizations work with specific communities and cultures, like Black or Latino families, or they can help with certain problems, like substance use or family violence. Look for ones that fit your family’s needs. 

What if I can’t find a good fit for my child?

Behavioral health providers are only one form of support that you have at your disposal. Your child might benefit from activities in the community, being mentored by a youth who has had a similar experience, or learning more about their identity and ancestry.