Are the behaviors you’re worried about out of the ordinary for them?

Kids, like adults, have different personalities, sometimes called temperaments. Some kids are quiet and shy, while others are more outgoing. Some kids get excited about new experiences while others are more careful and cautious. Every child is different. It might be time to worry when your child’s behavior is out of the ordinary for them.

Behaviors to keep an eye on

For young children, this might look like changes in their sleep, eating, or behavior patterns. You might see more crying, difficulty soothing, more clinging, and showing more frustration or other ‘big feelings’, or they may be unusually quiet or be withdrawn more often, or acting younger than their age. These might simply be a normal part of their development, but they could also signal that your child may need more support.

For older kids, this might look like refusing to go to school, spending less time with friends or family, not caring for their personal hygiene, not doing activities that they used to enjoy doing, as well as changes to their eating and sleeping habits.

Are the behaviors you’re worried about going away?

All kids get sad from time to time or have grouchy days. During stressful times, children might be sad, grouchy, angry, or worried more often because of the changes happening around them. For children, stress and the feeling of distress may show up as changes in their behavior or even physical symptoms. These are normal and expected feelings. But if these feelings go on and on and don’t seem to get better, then it might be helpful to get more support.

Are the behaviors you’re worried about getting in the way of daily life?

Getting nervous before a test or being sad after losing a loved one is normal, but if your child starts to refuse to go to school or stops eating, then it might be time to worry. In fact, any time an emotion or behavior gets in the way of their usual activities or relationships, it might be helpful to get more support.

Young children, in particular, are sensitive to their caregivers’ stress. For that reason, if it looks like these changes in behaviors are also impacting you or others in your child’s life, it might be helpful to get support for the rest of your family too.

Are there multiple feelings or behaviors you are worried about?

One or two feelings or behaviors that seem out of the ordinary might not be cause for concern. Especially if they come and go quickly. Everyone gets sad, scared, upset, angry, and worried from time to time. But when you notice lots of changes in your child’s attitude, behavior, or development, it might be helpful to get support. So if your child is not sleeping well for a couple of days, that might not be a problem to worry about by itself. But if they are not sleeping well, are avoiding friends, and are not eating normally, then it might be time to worry.